The Buzz
Coaches build on your career
Q My boss says I need coaching if I want to be promoted. I’m feeling singled out. How is coaching going to help me and what guarantee do I have that what I say won’t be used against me by my boss?
A This is the best possible news. Your boss is actually saying he’s confident in your untapped potential and you’re worth the investment. You’re also in good company. Up to 40 per cent of Fortune 500 companies engage coaches for their high performers.
Coaching is a powerful way of moving you from where you are currently to where you want to be — producing extraordinary results in less time than you could typically accomplish alone.
In two or three focused confidential sessions each month, a coach accelerates progress by asking provocative questions, listening, contributing observations and directing your awareness, choices and actions. Any reporting out to management will come from you, not your coach.
As a client you’ll gain clarity, insight and learning. By building on your strengths, revealing blind spots, developing new competencies and taking effective actions, you’ll be able to replace unproductive outdated strategies.
Results are entirely dependent on your willingness to invest in the coaching. Ninety seven per cent of clients report coaching exceeded their expectations. More than 75 per cent experience improved working relationships, while over 60 per cent experience smarter goal setting, an increase in job satisfaction and less stress. Who doesn’t want that?
Choose a coach you trust and who is certified by the International Coach Federation — the worldwide professional governing body. A full description of the ethical standards is available at www.coachfederation.org.
Originally printed in The Province Feb 14, 2010.
End bullying in workplace
Q: My boss’s friend is disregarding my role as her supervisor, treating me rudely and telling lies about me. As a leader, how can I prevent this kind of behaviour from spreading throughout the organization?
A: Examples of workplace bullying include being spoken to in a dismissive tone ( “talked down to”); spreading malicious rumours; gossip or innuendo that isn’t true; character assassinations; an arrogant attitude; screaming; swearing or being hypercritical. Tolerating this type of behaviour from a subordinate will diminish your authority with others. The most effective way to ending abuse is to demonstrate management’s commitment to respect at work.
-Create a workplace code of conduct with concrete examples of acceptable/ unacceptable behaviours and working conditions. Distribute this among staff, encouraging their input and buy-in.
-Set up a written process for recording and dealing with all conflicts seriously, promptly and confidentially without reprisal to the target. Outline the consequences for acts of bullying and the effective start date of the prevention program. Initially, targets should attempt to work out situations themselves by firmly telling the bully their behaviour is unacceptable and asking them to stop. They should record abusive events with the date, time and a detailed account of what happened. Maintain copies of all correspondence from the perpetrator.
If the behaviour continues, the complainant should report it to their supervisor. If their concern is minimized or dismissed, they should escalate to the next level of management. An impartial third party should be available to resolve situations when necessary. Retaliation is not an option; when a victim becomes a perpetrator, it can evaluate the situation and make abuse more pervasive.
Originally printed in The Province Jan 3, 2010.
Bully victim must seek help
Q: I am the victim of office bullying and my supervisor turns a blind eye to the situation. What can I do?
A: We expect bullying will end once we leave the school yard; however, according to the Workplace Bullying Institute (www.workplacebullying.org), almost half of working Americans have been affected by bullying on the job.
Workplace bullies use words or actions to assert power over their targets through aggression. They degrade, belittle, sabotage, threaten or humiliate to psychologically hurt or isolate.
If you feel you are the victim of bullying, first acknowledge that it’s happening and the emotional stress on you. Don’t allow this cruelty to undermine your self-confidence or feel ashamed of yourself. Stop being a target by seeking the advice of a mentor, coach or health professional who understands bullying.
Recognize that the perpetrator needs to control someone who enables or tolerates their behaviour. It continues as long as it is rewarded with the desired reaction or response. What repercussions are you afraid of that are preventing you from standing your ground?
While you can’t change another person, you can influence the situation by asserting yourself. Only confront the bully if your physical safety isn’t threatened. Only address the facts by remaining calm and professional. Don’t show any weakness or self-doubt.
Often subtle, bullying can go undetected — except by the intended target. Document the offensive behaviour and tell your supervisor so it is exposed. If the abuse continues, you can contact the provincial human-rights office or a lawyer to determine your right to recourse.
Bullying doesn’t flourish where it’s not tolerated. If you are not getting the support you need from your leaders, you may decide to leave the workplace with your dignity for an organization committed to a culture of respect.
Originally printed in The Province, Nov 22, 2009.
Be very clear in assigning tasks
Q: Even when I give my staff member a simple task to do, such as creating a news release, and explain how I want it done, she solicits her co-workers’ suggestions and the job ends up getting done differently than I wanted. How can I change this?
A: It sounds like your direct report may need some additional time or reassurance from you before she is set loose. Here’s an approach that may generate more productive results.
She may be feeling micro-managed when you tell her how to accomplish the task. If she doesn’t feel she has the freedom to incorporate her own great ideas, she may be rallying support to defy “your way.”
Rather than telling her how you want it done, inform her of the end result you’re looking for. Explain why this task is important and relevant. It is more meaningful when she understands how it ties into a larger picture.
Let her know what key elements need to be included in the project and the deadline, then give her free reign to make it happen.
Before she leaves, check to see if she needs any further clarification. To ensure you are both on the same page, ask what she views is the value of this task and what support she thinks she might need for her to successfully complete it according to your requirements.
Boost her confidence by acknowledging one of her shining qualities or characteristics.
For example, “You are creative and organized. You’ll produce a great news release.” Assure her that you are available for further assistance.
When she returns with the finished product, find something positive to acknowledge. That will encourage more of the same behaviour next time. Finally, re-evaluate if the tasks are appropriate for her skill or interest level.
Originally published in The Province, Oct 11, 2009.
Be co-operative on feedback
Q: As a new manager, I have to give an employee some feedback on a job she thinks she’s doing well. How can I be direct without getting her back up?
A: Hard feedback is effective when delivered with a soft start-up. First, get a clear picture of how your employee thinks she’s doing and why. Suspend your opinion and explore her perspective with genuine curiosity. While you don’t need to agree, letting her know you understand and accept her will make her more open to your viewpoint later.
Point out qualities you value in her — irrespective of her performance — such as her initiative, determination and reliability. Be direct and specific about what is working and why: “You are diligent and meet your deadlines. You keep projects moving forward and on track.”
Provide clear, concise and matter-of-fact feedback about what’s not working. Point to the tasks — not her personally — avoiding all-or-nothing language. For example, “your reports lack the necessary details to support your point of view.”
Any hint of impatience or blame will raise defensiveness. Calmly explain the cost to her: “When your reports are superficial, the reader can discount your logic.” Demonstrate your commitment to her success by pointing to specific changes that would produce successful results: “Including relevant case studies and key metrics would make your argument more compelling.”
Let her know you believe in her ability. “You have a solid grasp of the issues. All you have to do is provide more back-up for the reader.”
Ask her what steps she’s willing to commit to and set a time together to revisit the issue. Limiting the amount of corrective feedback and presenting it as a gift will leave your employee hopeful and motivated rather than daunted and demoralized.
Originally printed in The Province August 30, 2009.
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